Original
Modern English
I pray you now, good master Slender’s serving-man, and friend Simple by your name, which way have you looked for Master Caius, that calls himself doctor of physic?
Please, good man, Slender’s servant, and friend Simple, by your name, where have you looked for Master Caius, who calls himself a doctor?
Marry, sir, the pittie-ward, the park-ward, every way; old Windsor way, and every way but the town way.
Well, sir, the pity-ward, the park-ward, everywhere; old Windsor road, and everywhere but the town road.
I most fehemently desire you you will also look that way.
I strongly ask that you also look down that way.
I will, sir.
I will, sir.
’Pless my soul, how full of chollors I am, and trempling of mind! I shall be glad if he have deceived me. How melancholies I am! I will knog his urinals about his knave’s costard when I have good opportunities for the ork. ’Pless my soul!
Good heavens, how full of anger I am, and how my mind is racing! I’ll be glad if he has tricked me. How sad I am! I’ll hit him on the head with his own pot when I get the chance. Good heavens!
To shallow rivers, to whose falls Melodious birds sings madrigals; There will we make our peds of roses, And a thousand fragrant posies. To shallow-- Mercy on me! I have a great dispositions to cry.
To shallow rivers, where the falls Melodious birds sing love songs; There we’ll make our beds of roses, And a thousand sweet-smelling flowers. To shallow-- Mercy on me! I feel like crying.
Melodious birds sing madrigals-- When as I sat in Pabylon-- And a thousand vagram posies. To shallow & c.
Melodious birds sing love songs-- When I sat in Babylon-- And a thousand wandering flowers. To shallow & c.
Yonder he is coming, this way, Sir Hugh.
There he is, coming this way, Sir Hugh.
He’s welcome.
He’s welcome.
To shallow rivers, to whose falls- Heaven prosper the right! What weapons is he?
To shallow rivers, to whose falls- Heaven bless the right side! What weapons is he
No weapons, sir. There comes my master, Master Shallow, and another gentleman, from Frogmore, over the stile, this way.
No weapons, sir. Here comes my master, Master Shallow, and another gentleman, from Frogmore, over the stile, this way.
Pray you, give me my gown; or else keep it in your arms.
Please, give me my gown; or else hold it in your arms.
How now, master Parson! Good morrow, good Sir Hugh. Keep a gamester from the dice, and a good student from his book, and it is wonderful.
Hello, Master Parson! Good morning, good Sir Hugh. Keep a gambler away from the dice, and a good student away from his book, and it’s amazing.
[Aside] Ah, sweet Anne Page!
[Aside] Ah, sweet Anne Page!
’Save you, good Sir Hugh!
God save you, good Sir Hugh!
’Pless you from his mercy sake, all of you!
Bless you, for His mercy’s sake, all of you!
What, the sword and the word! do you study them both, master parson?
What, the sword and the word! Do you study both, Master Parson?
And youthful still! in your doublet and hose this raw rheumatic day!
And still so youthful! In your doublet and hose this raw, rheumatic day!
There is reasons and causes for it.
There are reasons and causes for it.
We are come to you to do a good office, master parson.
We’ve come to you to do a good deed, Master Parson.
Fery well: what is it?
Very well: what is it?
Yonder is a most reverend gentleman, who, belike having received wrong by some person, is at most odds with his own gravity and patience that ever you saw.
Over there is a very respected gentleman, who, perhaps having been wronged by someone, is extremely upset and struggling to maintain his composure and patience like never before.
I have lived fourscore years and upward; I never heard a man of his place, gravity and learning, so wide of his own respect.
I’ve lived eighty years and more; I’ve never heard a man of his position, seriousness, and education, act so out of character.
What is he?
Who is he?
I think you know him; Master Doctor Caius, the renowned French physician.
I think you know him; Master Doctor Caius, the famous French doctor.
Got’s will, and his passion of my heart! I had as lief you would tell me of a mess of porridge.
God’s will, and my heart! I’d rather you tell me about a bowl of porridge.
Why?
Why?
He has no more knowledge in Hibocrates and Galen, --and he is a knave besides; a cowardly knave as you would desires to be acquainted withal.
He knows nothing about Hippocrates and Galen, --and he’s a fool too; a cowardly fool that you would want to be friends with.
I warrant you, he’s the man should fight with him.
I swear, he’s the man who should fight him.
[Aside] O sweet Anne Page!
[Aside] Oh, sweet Anne Page!
It appears so by his weapons. Keep them asunder: here comes Doctor Caius.
It looks like it from his weapons. Keep them apart: here comes Doctor Caius.
Nay, good master parson, keep in your weapon.
No, good master parson, keep your weapon sheathed.
So do you, good master doctor.
So do you, good master doctor.
Disarm them, and let them question: let them keep their limbs whole and hack our English.
Disarm them, and let them talk: let them keep their limbs intact and mess up our English.
I pray you, let-a me speak a word with your ear. Vherefore vill you not meet-a me?
I beg you, let me speak a word in your ear. Why won’t you meet me?
[Aside to DOCTOR CAIUS] Pray you, use your patience: in good time.
[Aside to DOCTOR CAIUS] Please, be patient: it’s about time.
By gar, you are de coward, de Jack dog, John ape.
By God, you are a coward, a worthless dog, a monkey.
[Aside to DOCTOR CAIUS] Pray you let us not be laughing-stocks to other men’s humours; I desire you in friendship, and I will one way or other make you amends.
[Aside to DOCTOR CAIUS] Please, let’s not be the laughingstock of other people’s jokes; I’m asking you as a friend, and I’ll make it right one way or another.
I will knog your urinals about your knave’s cockscomb for missing your meetings and appointments.
I’ll beat you up for missing your meetings and appointments.
Diable! Jack Rugby,--mine host de Jarteer,--have I not stay for him to kill him? have I not, at de place I did appoint?
Damn! Jack Rugby, my landlord, didn’t I wait for him to kill him? Didn’t I wait at the place I said I would?
As I am a Christians soul now, look you, this is the place appointed: I’ll be judgement by mine host of the Garter.
As I’m a Christian, look, this is the place we agreed on: I’ll be the judge, with my landlord from the Garter.
Peace, I say, Gallia and Gaul, French and Welsh, soul-curer and body-curer!
Quiet, I say, French and Welsh, healer of souls and healer of bodies!
Ay, dat is very good; excellent.
Yes, that’s very good; excellent.
Peace, I say! hear mine host of the Garter. Am I politic? am I subtle? am I a Machiavel? Shall I lose my doctor? no; he gives me the potions and the motions. Shall I lose my parson, my priest, my Sir Hugh? no; he gives me the proverbs and the no-verbs. Give me thy hand, terrestrial; so. Give me thy hand, celestial; so. Boys of art, I have deceived you both; I have directed you to wrong places: your hearts are mighty, your skins are whole, and let burnt sack be the issue. Come, lay their swords to pawn. Follow me, lads of peace; follow, follow, follow.
Quiet, I say! Listen to my landlord from the Garter. Am I clever? Am I sneaky? Am I a Machiavellian schemer? Should I let go of my doctor? No; he gives me the potions and the motions. Should I let go of my priest, my Sir Hugh? No; he gives me the proverbs and the sayings. Give me your hand, earthly one; so. Give me your hand, heavenly one; so. Artful boys, I’ve tricked you both; I’ve sent you to the wrong places: your hearts are strong, your bodies are unharmed, and let the wine be the outcome. Come, let’s bet their swords. Follow me, lads of peace; follow, follow, follow.
Trust me, a mad host. Follow, gentlemen, follow.
Trust me, a crazy landlord. Follow, gentlemen, follow.
[Aside] O sweet Anne Page!
[Aside] Oh sweet Anne Page!
Ha, do I perceive dat? have you make-a de sot of us, ha, ha?
Ha, do I see that? Are you making a fool of us, ha, ha?
This is well; he has made us his vlouting-stog. I desire you that we may be friends; and let us knog our prains together to be revenge on this same scall, scurvy cogging companion, the host of the Garter.
This is good; he’s made a fool of us. I want us to be friends, and let’s knock our brains together to get revenge on this same tricky, deceitful host from the Garter.
By gar, with all my heart. He promise to bring me where is Anne Page; by gar, he deceive me too.
By God, with all my heart. He promised to take me to Anne Page; by God, he deceived me too.
Well, I will smite his noddles. Pray you, follow.
Well, I will hit him hard. Please, follow me.