Original
Modern English
DON
DON
Warble, child; make passionate my sense of hearing.
Sing, child; make my hearing feel the emotion.
Concolinel.
Concolinel.
DON
DON
Sweet air! Go, tenderness of years; take this key, give enlargement to the swain, bring him festinately hither: I must employ him in a letter to my love.
Sweet sound! Go, gentle years; take this key, let the young man out, bring him quickly here: I need to send him with a letter to my love.
Master, will you win your love with a French brawl? DON
Master, are you going to win your love with a French fight? DON
How meanest thou? brawling in French?
What do you mean? A fight in French?
No, my complete master: but to jig off a tune at the tongue’s end, canary to it with your feet, humour it with turning up your eyelids, sigh a note and sing a note, sometime through the throat, as if you swallowed love with singing love, sometime through the nose, as if you snuffed up love by smelling love; with your hat penthouse-like o’er the shop of your eyes; with your arms crossed on your thin-belly doublet like a rabbit on a spit; or your hands in your pocket like a man after the old painting; and keep not too long in one tune, but a snip and away. These are complements, these are humours; these betray nice wenches, that would be betrayed without these; and make them men of note--do you note me?--that most are affected to these. DON
No, my perfect master: but to end a tune quickly, dance it with your feet, act it with your eyes, sigh a note and sing a note, sometimes through your throat, as if you swallowed love while singing it, sometimes through your nose, as if you sniffed love by smelling it; with your hat tilted like a roof over your eyes; with your arms crossed like a rabbit on a spit; or your hands in your pocket like a man in an old painting; and don’t stay too long on one tune, but cut it short and move on. These are gestures, these are moods; they fool innocent girls, who would be tricked without them; and make men of note— do you understand me?—those who are most attracted to these. DON
How hast thou purchased this experience?
How did you learn all this?
By my penny of observation. DON
By my penny of observation. DON
But O,--but O,--
But oh, but oh,
’The hobby-horse is forgot.’ DON
"The hobby-horse is forgotten." DON
Callest thou my love ’hobby-horse’?
Do you call my love a ’hobby-horse’?
No, master; the hobby-horse is but a colt, and your love perhaps a hackney. But have you forgot your love? DON
No, master; the hobby-horse is just a young horse, and your love might just be a worn-out one. But have you forgotten your love? DON
Almost I had.
I almost did.
Negligent student! learn her by heart. DON
Careless student! Learn it by heart. DON
By heart and in heart, boy.
By heart and in my heart, boy.
And out of heart, master: all those three I will prove. DON
And out of heart, master: I’ll prove all three. DON
What wilt thou prove?
What will you prove?
A man, if I live; and this, by, in, and without, upon the instant: by heart you love her, because your heart cannot come by her; in heart you love her, because your heart is in love with her; and out of heart you love her, being out of heart that you cannot enjoy her. DON
A man, if I live; and this, by, in, and out of, all at once: by heart you love her, because you can’t get her; in heart you love her, because your heart is in love with her; and out of heart you love her, because you’re sad that you can’t be with her. DON
I am all these three.
I’m all of those three.
And three times as much more, and yet nothing at all. DON
And three times more than that, and still nothing at all. DON
Fetch hither the swain: he must carry me a letter.
Bring me the young man: he needs to deliver a letter for me.
A message well sympathized; a horse to be ambassador for an ass. DON
A well-matched message; sending a horse to carry a fool. DON
Ha, ha! what sayest thou?
Ha, ha! What do you mean?
Marry, sir, you must send the ass upon the horse, for he is very slow-gaited. But I go. DON
Well, sir, you should send the fool on the horse, because he’s really slow. But I’m off. DON
The way is but short: away!
The way is short: go quickly!
As swift as lead, sir. DON
As fast as lead, sir. DON
The meaning, pretty ingenious? Is not lead a metal heavy, dull, and slow?
The meaning, pretty clever? Isn’t lead a metal that’s heavy, dull, and slow?
Minime, honest master; or rather, master, no. DON
No, honest master; or rather, master, no. DON
I say lead is slow.
I say lead is slow.
You are too swift, sir, to say so: Is that lead slow which is fired from a gun? DON
You are too quick, sir, to say that: Is lead slow if it’s fired from a gun? DON
Sweet smoke of rhetoric! He reputes me a cannon; and the bullet, that’s he: I shoot thee at the swain.
Sweet words of speech! He thinks I’m a cannon, and the bullet, that’s me: I shoot you at the boy.
Thump then and I flee.
Hit me then and I’ll run.
DON
DON
A most acute juvenal; voluble and free of grace! By thy favour, sweet welkin, I must sigh in thy face: Most rude melancholy, valour gives thee place. My herald is return’d.
A very sharp young man; quick-talking and graceful! By your leave, sweet sky, I must sigh right at you: Most rude sadness, courage takes your place. My messenger has returned.
A wonder, master! here’s a costard broken in a shin. DON
A wonder, master! here’s a head of cabbage broken on the leg. DON
Some enigma, some riddle: come, thy l’envoy; begin.
Some puzzle, some riddle: come on, your message; start.
No enigma, no riddle, no l’envoy; no salve in the mail, sir: O, sir, plantain, a plain plantain! no l’envoy, no l’envoy; no salve, sir, but a plantain! DON
No puzzle, no riddle, no message; no healing in the mail, sir: Oh, sir, plantain, a simple plantain! no message, no message; no healing, sir, just a plantain! DON
By virtue, thou enforcest laughter; thy silly thought my spleen; the heaving of my lungs provokes me to ridiculous smiling. O, pardon me, my stars! Doth the inconsiderate take salve for l’envoy, and the word l’envoy for a salve?
By goodness, you make me laugh; your foolish thought makes me angry; the rise of my chest forces me to ridiculous smiling. Oh, excuse me, my stars! Does the thoughtless person take healing for a message, and the word message for healing?
Do the wise think them other? is not l’envoy a salve? DON
Do the wise think they are different? isn’t a message healing? DON
No, page: it is an epilogue or discourse, to make plain Some obscure precedence that hath tofore been sain. I will example it: The fox, the ape, and the humble-bee, Were still at odds, being but three. There’s the moral. Now the l’envoy.
No, boy: it is an epilogue or speech, to explain Some unclear background that has been said before. I’ll give an example: The fox, the ape, and the humble-bee, Were always arguing, being just three. That’s the lesson. Now the message.
I will add the l’envoy. Say the moral again. DON
I’ll add the ending. Say the moral again. DON
The fox, the ape, and the humble-bee, Were still at odds, being but three.
The fox, the monkey, and the bee, Were still in disagreement, being just three.
Until the goose came out of door, And stay’d the odds by adding four. Now will I begin your moral, and do you follow with my l’envoy. The fox, the ape, and the humble-bee, Were still at odds, being but three. DON
Until the goose came out the door, And stopped the fight by adding four. Now I’ll start your moral, and you follow with my ending. The fox, the monkey, and the bee, Were still in disagreement, being just three. DON
Until the goose came out of door, Staying the odds by adding four.
Until the goose came out the door, Stopping the fight by adding four.
A good l’envoy, ending in the goose: would you desire more?
A good ending, finishing with the goose: would you like more?
The boy hath sold him a bargain, a goose, that’s flat. Sir, your pennyworth is good, an your goose be fat. To sell a bargain well is as cunning as fast and loose: Let me see; a fat l’envoy; ay, that’s a fat goose. DON
The boy has made a deal, a goose, that’s all. Sir, your bargain is good, if your goose is fat. To make a good deal is as tricky as cheating: Let me see; a fat ending; yes, that’s a fat goose. DON
Come hither, come hither. How did this argument begin?
Come here, come here. How did this argument start?
By saying that a costard was broken in a shin. Then call’d you for the l’envoy.
By saying that a "costard" was broken in a shin. Then you called for the ending.
True, and I for a plantain: thus came your argument in; Then the boy’s fat l’envoy, the goose that you bought; And he ended the market. DON
True, and I called for a plantain: that’s how your argument began; Then the boy’s fat ending, the goose you bought; And he ended the deal. DON
But tell me; how was there a costard broken in a shin?
But tell me; how was there a "costard" broken in a shin?
I will tell you sensibly.
I’ll tell you clearly.
Thou hast no feeling of it, Moth: I will speak that l’envoy: I Costard, running out, that was safely within, Fell over the threshold and broke my shin. DON
You don’t understand it, Moth: I’ll say the ending: I, Costard, running out, was safely inside, Tripped over the threshold and broke my shin. DON
We will talk no more of this matter.
We won’t talk about this matter anymore.
Till there be more matter in the shin. DON
Until there’s more to discuss about the shin. DON
Sirrah Costard, I will enfranchise thee.
Sir Costard, I will free you.
O, marry me to one Frances: I smell some l’envoy, some goose, in this. DON
Oh, marry me to a woman named Frances: I smell some ending, some goose, in this. DON
By my sweet soul, I mean setting thee at liberty, enfreedoming thy person; thou wert immured, restrained, captivated, bound.
By my sweet soul, I mean setting you free, freeing your body; you were locked up, restrained, trapped, bound.
True, true; and now you will be my purgation and let me loose. DON
True, true; and now you’ll be my salvation and set me free. DON
I give thee thy liberty, set thee from durance; and, in lieu thereof, impose on thee nothing but this: bear this significant
I give you your freedom, release you from confinement; and, instead of that, I ask nothing but this: take this important
to the country maid Jaquenetta: there is remuneration; for the best ward of mine honour is rewarding my dependents. Moth, follow.
to the country girl Jaquenetta: there’s a reward; for the best way I show my honor is by rewarding those who depend on me. Moth, follow.
Like the sequel, I. Signior Costard, adieu.
Like the sequel, I. Sir Costard, farewell.
My sweet ounce of man’s flesh! my incony Jew!
My sweet little piece of man’s flesh! my silly fool!
Now will I look to his remuneration. Remuneration! O, that’s the Latin word for three farthings: three farthings--remuneration.--’What’s the price of this inkle?’--’One penny.’--’No, I’ll give you a remuneration:’ why, it carries it. Remuneration! why, it is a fairer name than French crown. I will never buy and sell out of this word.
Now I’ll focus on his reward. Reward! Oh, that’s the Latin word for three pennies: three pennies—reward.—’What’s the price of this ribbon?’—’One penny.’—’No, I’ll give you a reward:’ why, it makes sense. Reward! why, it’s a better name than a French crown. I’ll never buy or sell without using this word.
O, my good knave Costard! exceedingly well met.
Oh, my good fellow Costard! so good to see you.
Pray you, sir, how much carnation ribbon may a man buy for a remuneration?
Please, sir, how much carnation ribbon can a man buy for a reward?
What is a remuneration?
What’s a reward?
Marry, sir, halfpenny farthing.
Well, sir, half a penny.
Why, then, three-farthing worth of silk.
Well, then, three-penny worth of silk.
I thank your worship: God be wi’ you!
Thank you, sir: God be with you!
Stay, slave; I must employ thee: As thou wilt win my favour, good my knave, Do one thing for me that I shall entreat.
Wait, you servant; I need to ask something of you: If you want to earn my favor, my good fellow, Do one thing for me that I’ll ask of you.
When would you have it done, sir?
When do you want it done, sir?
This afternoon.
This afternoon.
Well, I will do it, sir: fare you well.
Alright, I’ll do it, sir: goodbye.
Thou knowest not what it is.
You don’t even know what it is yet.
I shall know, sir, when I have done it.
I’ll know, sir, once I’ve done it.
Why, villain, thou must know first.
No, fool, you need to know first.
I will come to your worship to-morrow morning.
I’ll come to you tomorrow morning.
It must be done this afternoon. Hark, slave, it is but this: The princess comes to hunt here in the park, And in her train there is a gentle lady; When tongues speak sweetly, then they name her name, And Rosaline they call her: ask for her; And to her white hand see thou do commend This seal’d-up counsel. There’s thy guerdon; go.
It has to be done this afternoon. Listen, fool, it’s simple: The princess is coming to hunt in the park, And in her group, there’s a lady; When people speak kindly, they say her name, And they call her Rosaline: ask for her; And make sure you give this sealed message Into her white hand. There’s your reward; go.
Gardon, O sweet gardon! better than remuneration, a’leven-pence farthing better: most sweet gardon! I will do it sir, in print. Gardon! Remuneration!
A reward, oh sweet reward! better than pay, eleven pence better: most sweet reward! I will do it, sir, in writing. Reward! Pay!
And I, forsooth, in love! I, that have been love’s whip; A very beadle to a humorous sigh; A critic, nay, a night-watch constable; A domineering pedant o’er the boy; Than whom no mortal so magnificent! This whimpled, whining, purblind, wayward boy; This senior-junior, giant-dwarf, Dan Cupid; Regent of love-rhymes, lord of folded arms, The anointed sovereign of sighs and groans, Liege of all loiterers and malcontents, Dread prince of plackets, king of codpieces, Sole imperator and great general Of trotting ’paritors:--O my little heart:-- And I to be a corporal of his field, And wear his colours like a tumbler’s hoop! What, I! I love! I sue! I seek a wife! A woman, that is like a German clock, Still a-repairing, ever out of frame, And never going aright, being a watch, But being watch’d that it may still go right! Nay, to be perjured, which is worst of all; And, among three, to love the worst of all; A wightly wanton with a velvet brow, With two pitch-balls stuck in her face for eyes; Ay, and by heaven, one that will do the deed Though Argus were her eunuch and her guard: And I to sigh for her! to watch for her! To pray for her! Go to; it is a plague That Cupid will impose for my neglect Of his almighty dreadful little might. Well, I will love, write, sigh, pray, sue and groan: Some men must love my lady and some Joan.
And I, truly, am in love! I, who have been love’s whip; A very beadle to a romantic sigh; A critic, no, a night-watchman; A bossy teacher over the boy; There’s no one more magnificent than him! This confused, whining, blind, rebellious boy; This old-young, giant-dwarf, Dan Cupid; Ruler of love poems, lord of crossed arms, The chosen king of sighs and groans, Lord of all lazy people and complainers, Terrifying prince of hidden treasures, king of funny underwear, The sole commander and great general Of running messengers:—Oh my poor little heart:— And I have to be a lowly soldier in his army, And wear his colors like a circus performer’s hoop! What, me! I love! I beg! I’m looking for a wife! A woman, like a German clock, Always needing fixing, always out of order, And never working properly, like a watch, But constantly watched so it stays on track! No, even worse, to be lied to, which is the worst of all; And, of three women, to love the worst of them; A playful flirt with a velvet forehead, With two lumps of coal stuck in her face for eyes; Yes, and by heaven, one who will do the deed Even if Argus were her guardian and her protector: And I’m supposed to sigh for her! Watch for her! Pray for her! Go on; it’s a curse That Cupid will lay on me for ignoring His powerful, terrifying little strength. Well, I will love, write, sigh, pray, beg and groan: Some men must love my lady, and some Joan.
LOVE’S LABOURS LOST
LOVE’S LABOURS LOST