All's Well That Ends Well · Act 3, Scene 5

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Enter an old Widow of Florence, DIANA, VIOLENTA, and MARIANA, with other Citizens
Enter an old Widow of Florence, DIANA, VIOLENTA, and MARIANA, with other Citizens
Widow

Nay, come; for if they do approach the city, we shall lose all the sight.

Widow

No, come on; if they’re coming to the city, we will miss all the action.

Diana

They say the French count has done most honourable service.

Diana

They say the French count has done some very honorable work.

Widow

It is reported that he has taken their greatest commander; and that with his own hand he slew the duke’s brother.

Widow

It’s been reported that he captured their top commander; and that with his own hand he killed the duke’s brother.

Tucket
Tucket
Widow

We have lost our labour; they are gone a contrary way: hark! you may know by their trumpets.

Widow

We’ve wasted our time; they’ve gone the other way: listen! You can tell by their trumpets.

Mariana

Come, let’s return again, and suffice ourselves with the report of it. Well, Diana, take heed of this French earl: the honour of a maid is her name; and no legacy is so rich as honesty.

Mariana

Let’s go back, and just be satisfied with the report. Well, Diana, be careful of this French earl: a woman’s honor is her reputation; and nothing is more valuable than honesty.

Widow

I have told my neighbour how you have been solicited by a gentleman his companion.

Widow

I’ve told my neighbor about how you were approached by a gentleman who’s his companion.

Mariana

I know that knave; hang him! one Parolles: a filthy officer he is in those suggestions for the young earl. Beware of them, Diana; their promises, enticements, oaths, tokens, and all these engines of lust, are not the things they go under: many a maid hath been seduced by them; and the misery is, example, that so terrible shows in the wreck of maidenhood, cannot for all that dissuade succession, but that they are limed with the twigs that threaten them. I hope I need not to advise you further; but I hope your own grace will keep you where you are, though there were no further danger known but the modesty which is so lost.

Mariana

I know that scoundrel; curse him! One Parolles: he’s a disgusting officer with his schemes for the young earl. Watch out for them, Diana; their promises, tricks, oaths, gifts, and all those tools of lust, are not what they appear to be: many a girl has been misled by them; and the sad truth is, that the awful examples of ruined innocence won’t stop others from following their path, as they’re caught in the traps that are set for them. I hope I don’t need to tell you more; but I trust your own sense of decency will keep you safe, even if the only danger was the loss of modesty.

Diana

You shall not need to fear me.

Diana

You don’t need to worry about me.

Widow

I hope so.

Widow

I hope not.

Enter HELENA, disguised like a Pilgrim
Enter HELENA, disguised like a Pilgrim
Widow

Look, here comes a pilgrim: I know she will lie at my house; thither they send one another: I’ll question her. God save you, pilgrim! whither are you bound?

Widow

Look, here comes a pilgrim: I’m sure she’ll stay at my house; they always send each other here: I’ll ask her. God bless you, pilgrim! Where are you headed?

Helena

To Saint Jaques le Grand. Where do the palmers lodge, I do beseech you?

Helena

To Saint Jaques le Grand. Where do the pilgrims stay, if you don’t mind me asking?

Widow

At the Saint Francis here beside the port.

Widow

At the Saint Francis just by the harbor.

Helena

Is this the way?

Helena

Is this the right way?

Widow

Ay, marry, is’t.

Widow

Yes, indeed, it is.

A march afar
A march afar
Widow

Hark you! they come this way. If you will tarry, holy pilgrim, But till the troops come by, I will conduct you where you shall be lodged; The rather, for I think I know your hostess As ample as myself.

Widow

Listen! They are coming this way. If you’ll wait, holy pilgrim, Until the soldiers pass by, I’ll show you where you can stay; I’m sure I know your host As well as I know myself.

Helena

Is it yourself?

Helena

Is it really you?

Widow

If you shall please so, pilgrim.

Widow

If it pleases you, pilgrim.

Helena

I thank you, and will stay upon your leisure.

Helena

Thank you, I’ll wait until you’re ready.

Widow

You came, I think, from France?

Widow

You came from France, I think?

Helena

I did so.

Helena

I did.

Widow

Here you shall see a countryman of yours That has done worthy service.

Widow

Here you’ll meet a fellow countryman Who’s done excellent service.

Helena

His name, I pray you.

Helena

What’s his name, please?

Diana

The Count Rousillon: know you such a one?

Diana

Count Roussillon: do you know him?

Helena

But by the ear, that hears most nobly of him: His face I know not.

Helena

I’ve only heard of him, and he’s spoken of very highly: But I don’t know his face.

Diana

Whatsome’er he is, He’s bravely taken here. He stole from France, As ’tis reported, for the king had married him Against his liking: think you it is so?

Diana

Whoever he is, He’s highly regarded here. He left France, As it’s said, because the king forced him to marry Against his will: do you think that’s true?

Helena

Ay, surely, mere the truth: I know his lady.

Helena

Yes, absolutely, that’s the truth: I know his wife.

Diana

There is a gentleman that serves the count Reports but coarsely of her.

Diana

There’s a man who works for the count Who doesn’t speak very well of her.

Helena

What’s his name?

Helena

What’s his name?

Diana

Monsieur Parolles.

Diana

Mister Parolles.

Helena

O, I believe with him, In argument of praise, or to the worth Of the great count himself, she is too mean To have her name repeated: all her deserving Is a reserved honesty, and that I have not heard examined.

Helena

Oh, I think she’s with him, When it comes to praise, or to the worth Of the great Count himself, she’s too insignificant To have her name mentioned: all her merit Is just reserved honesty, and that I haven’t heard anyone discuss.

Diana

Alas, poor lady! ’Tis a hard bondage to become the wife Of a detesting lord.

Diana

Oh, poor woman! It’s a tough life to be the wife Of a man you can’t stand.

Widow

I warrant, good creature, wheresoe’er she is, Her heart weighs sadly: this young maid might do her A shrewd turn, if she pleased.

Widow

I bet, poor thing, wherever she is, Her heart is heavy: this young girl could really help her If she wanted to.

Helena

How do you mean? May be the amorous count solicits her In the unlawful purpose.

Helena

How do you mean? Maybe the love-struck Count is trying to seduce her For an illegal purpose.

Widow

He does indeed; And brokes with all that can in such a suit Corrupt the tender honour of a maid: But she is arm’d for him and keeps her guard In honestest defence.

Widow

He really is; And does everything he can in a case like this To ruin the pure honor of a young woman: But she’s ready for him and stays on guard In the most honest defense.

Mariana

The gods forbid else!

Mariana

The gods forbid anything else!

Widow

So, now they come:

Widow

Here they come:

Drum and Colours
Drum and Colours
Enter BERTRAM, PAROLLES, and the whole army
Enter BERTRAM, PAROLLES, and the whole army
Widow

That is Antonio, the duke’s eldest son; That, Escalus.

Widow

That’s Antonio, the Duke’s oldest son; That’s Escalus.

Helena

Which is the Frenchman?

Helena

Which one is the Frenchman?

Diana

He; That with the plume: ’tis a most gallant fellow. I would he loved his wife: if he were honester He were much goodlier: is’t not a handsome gentleman?

Diana

He; The one with the feather in his hat: he’s a very impressive man. I wish he loved his wife: if he were more honest He’d be much more attractive: isn’t he a handsome man?

Helena

I like him well.

Helena

I think he’s fine.

Diana

’Tis pity he is not honest: yond’s that same knave That leads him to these places: were I his lady, I would Poison that vile rascal.

Diana

It’s a shame he’s not honest: that’s the same scoundrel Who leads him to these places: if I were his wife, I’d poison that disgusting rascal.

Helena

Which is he?

Helena

Which one is he?

Diana

That jack-an-apes with scarfs: why is he melancholy?

Diana

That idiot with the scarves: why is he so sad?

Helena

Perchance he’s hurt i’ the battle.

Helena

Maybe he’s been hurt in the fight.

Parolles

Lose our drum! well.

Parolles

We lost our drum! Oh well.

Mariana

He’s shrewdly vexed at something: look, he has spied us.

Mariana

He’s really upset about something: look, he’s seen us.

Widow

Marry, hang you!

Widow

Damn you!

Mariana

And your courtesy, for a ring-carrier!

Mariana

And your politeness, like a messenger carrying rings!

Exeunt BERTRAM, PAROLLES, and army
Exeunt BERTRAM, PAROLLES, and army
Widow

The troop is past. Come, pilgrim, I will bring you Where you shall host: of enjoin’d penitents There’s four or five, to great Saint Jaques bound, Already at my house.

Widow

The group has passed. Come, pilgrim, I’ll take you Where you’ll stay: there are four or five penitents Heading to Saint James already at my house.

Helena

I humbly thank you: Please it this matron and this gentle maid To eat with us to-night, the charge and thanking Shall be for me; and, to requite you further, I will bestow some precepts of this virgin Worthy the note.

Helena

I sincerely thank you: If it pleases this lady and this kind young woman To dine with us tonight, I’ll cover the costs and the thanks Will be mine; and to thank you further, I’ll share some advice from this saintly woman That’s worth remembering.

Both

We’ll take your offer kindly.

Both

We’ll gladly accept your offer.

Exuent
Exuent

End of Act 3, Scene 5

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