A Midsummer Night's Dream · Act 1, Scene 2

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Enter QUINCE, SNUG, BOTTOM, FLUTE, SNOUT, and STARVELING
Enter QUINCE, SNUG, BOTTOM, FLUTE, SNOUT, and STARVELING
Quince

Is all our company here?

Quince

Is everyone here for our play?

Bottom

You were best to call them generally, man by man, according to the scrip.

Bottom

You’d better call them one by one, man by man, just like it says on the list.

Quince

Here is the scroll of every man’s name, which is thought fit, through all Athens, to play in our interlude before the duke and the duchess, on his wedding-day at night.

Quince

Here’s the list of everyone’s name who is considered fit, all across Athens, to perform in our play before the duke and duchess, on his wedding night.

Bottom

First, good Peter Quince, say what the play treats on, then read the names of the actors, and so grow to a point.

Bottom

First, good Peter Quince, tell us what the play is about, then read the actors’ names, and let’s get to it.

Quince

Marry, our play is, The most lamentable comedy, and most cruel death of Pyramus and Thisby.

Quince

Well, our play is called *The Most Lamentable Comedy, and Most Cruel Death of Pyramus and Thisby.*

Bottom

A very good piece of work, I assure you, and a merry. Now, good Peter Quince, call forth your actors by the scroll. Masters, spread yourselves.

Bottom

A very good play, I assure you, and funny too. Now, good Peter Quince, call out the actors by name. Everyone, get ready.

Quince

Answer as I call you. Nick Bottom, the weaver.

Quince

Answer when I call you. Nick Bottom, the weaver.

Bottom

Ready. Name what part I am for, and proceed.

Bottom

Ready. Tell me what part I’m playing, and let’s go.

Quince

You, Nick Bottom, are set down for Pyramus.

Quince

You, Nick Bottom, are playing Pyramus.

Bottom

What is Pyramus? a lover, or a tyrant?

Bottom

Who is Pyramus? A lover, or a tyrant?

Quince

A lover, that kills himself most gallant for love.

Quince

A lover, who kills himself very dramatically for love.

Bottom

That will ask some tears in the true performing of it: if I do it, let the audience look to their eyes; I will move storms, I will condole in some measure. To the rest: yet my chief humour is for a tyrant: I could play Ercles rarely, or a part to tear a cat in, to make all split. The raging rocks And shivering shocks Shall break the locks Of prison gates; And Phibbus’ car Shall shine from far And make and mar The foolish Fates. This was lofty! Now name the rest of the players. This is Ercles’ vein, a tyrant’s vein; a lover is more condoling.

Bottom

That will require some real tears when I perform it: if I do it, let the audience watch their eyes; I’ll bring on the storms, I’ll make them feel some sadness. But my real strength is for playing a tyrant: I could play Heracles (Hercules) wonderfully, or a role that tears a cat apart to make everyone go crazy. The raging rocks And crashing shocks Will break the locks Of prison gates; And Phibbus’ chariot Will shine from far And mess with The foolish Fates. That was powerful! Now, tell me who the rest of the actors are. This is Heracles’ style, a tyrant’s style; a lover would be more gentle.

Quince

Francis Flute, the bellows-mender.

Quince

Francis Flute, the bellows-mender.

Flute

Here, Peter Quince.

Flute

Here, Peter Quince.

Quince

Flute, you must take Thisby on you.

Quince

Flute, you have to play Thisby.

Flute

What is Thisby? a wandering knight?

Flute

Who’s Thisby? A wandering knight?

Quince

It is the lady that Pyramus must love.

Quince

She’s the lady Pyramus has to love.

Flute

Nay, faith, let me not play a woman; I have a beard coming.

Flute

No way, I can’t play a woman; I’m growing a beard.

Quince

That’s all one: you shall play it in a mask, and you may speak as small as you will.

Quince

It doesn’t matter: you’ll wear a mask, and you can talk as quietly as you want.

Bottom

An I may hide my face, let me play Thisby too, I’ll speak in a monstrous little voice. ’Thisne, Thisne;’ ’Ah, Pyramus, lover dear! thy Thisby dear, and lady dear!’

Bottom

If I can hide my face, let me play Thisby too. I’ll speak in a really high voice. ’Thisne, Thisne;’ ’Oh, Pyramus, my love! your Thisby loves you, and dear lady!’

Quince

No, no; you must play Pyramus: and, Flute, you Thisby.

Quince

No, no; you have to play Pyramus, and Flute, you play Thisby.

Bottom

Well, proceed.

Bottom

Fine, go ahead.

Quince

Robin Starveling, the tailor.

Quince

Robin Starveling, the tailor.

Starveling

Here, Peter Quince.

Starveling

Here, Peter Quince.

Quince

Robin Starveling, you must play Thisby’s mother. Tom Snout, the tinker.

Quince

Robin Starveling, you play Thisby’s mother. Tom Snout, the tinker.

Snout

Here, Peter Quince.

Snout

Here, Peter Quince.

Quince

You, Pyramus’ father: myself, Thisby’s father: Snug, the joiner; you, the lion’s part: and, I hope, here is a play fitted.

Quince

You’re Pyramus’ father: I’ll be Thisby’s father. Snug, the joiner; you’re the lion: and I hope this play will work.

Snug

Have you the lion’s part written? pray you, if it be, give it me, for I am slow of study.

Snug

Do you have the lion’s part written? If you do, give it to me, because I’m slow to learn.

Quince

You may do it extempore, for it is nothing but roaring.

Quince

You can improvise it, it’s just roaring.

Bottom

Let me play the lion too: I will roar, that I will do any man’s heart good to hear me; I will roar, that I will make the duke say ’Let him roar again, let him roar again.’

Bottom

Let me play the lion too. I’ll roar so loudly that it’ll do anyone good to hear me; I’ll roar so loud the duke will say, ’Let him roar again, let him roar again.’

Quince

An you should do it too terribly, you would fright the duchess and the ladies, that they would shriek; and that were enough to hang us all.

Quince

If you do it too badly, you’ll scare the duchess and the ladies, and they’ll scream; and that would be enough to get us all hanged.

All

That would hang us, every mother’s son.

All

That would get us hanged, every single one of us.

Bottom

I grant you, friends, if that you should fright the ladies out of their wits, they would have no more discretion but to hang us: but I will aggravate my voice so that I will roar you as gently as any sucking dove; I will roar you an ’twere any nightingale.

Bottom

I agree with you, friends, if you scare the ladies so much they lose their minds, they’ll have no choice but to hang us: but I’ll make my voice so loud and fierce that I’ll roar like a soft dove; I’ll roar like a nightingale.

Quince

You can play no part but Pyramus; for Pyramus is a sweet-faced man; a proper man, as one shall see in a summer’s day; a most lovely gentleman-like man: therefore you must needs play Pyramus.

Quince

You can only play Pyramus; because Pyramus is a good-looking man, a handsome man, someone you’d see on a summer day; a truly charming, gentlemanly man: so you must play Pyramus.

Bottom

Well, I will undertake it. What beard were I best to play it in?

Bottom

Alright, I’ll do it. Which beard should I wear for it?

Quince

Why, what you will.

Quince

Wear whatever you like.

Bottom

I will discharge it in either your straw-colour beard, your orange-tawny beard, your purple-in-grain beard, or your French-crown-colour beard, your perfect yellow.

Bottom

I’ll wear either your straw-colored beard, your orange-brown beard, your deep purple beard, or your French-gold-colored beard, your perfect yellow.

Quince

Some of your French crowns have no hair at all, and then you will play bare-faced. But, masters, here are your parts: and I am to entreat you, request you and desire you, to con them by to-morrow night; and meet me in the palace wood, a mile without the town, by moonlight; there will we rehearse, for if we meet in the city, we shall be dogged with company, and our devices known. In the meantime I will draw a bill of properties, such as our play wants. I pray you, fail me not.

Quince

Some of your French-gold beards have no hair at all, and then you’ll be playing with no beard. But, gentlemen, here are your parts: and I ask you, urge you, and beg you, to memorize them by tomorrow night; and meet me in the palace wood, a mile outside the town, by moonlight; we’ll rehearse there, because if we meet in the city, we’ll be followed by crowds, and our plans will be found out. In the meantime, I’ll prepare a list of the props we need for the play. Please, don’t fail me.

Bottom

We will meet; and there we may rehearse most obscenely and courageously. Take pains; be perfect: adieu.

Bottom

We’ll meet; and there we can rehearse very boldly and thoroughly. Work hard; be perfect: goodbye.

Quince

At the duke’s oak we meet.

Quince

We’ll meet at the duke’s oak.

Bottom

Enough; hold or cut bow-strings.

Bottom

That’s enough; good luck.

Exuent
Exeunt

End of Act 1, Scene 2

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